Funny Tales From the Retail Sales Floor: Part 2

Earlier this year, I ran some funny stories from the retail sales floor, as provided by our readers, consumers, and from old archived issues of the magazine. Here's part-two of that section for your entertainment.

Why, Just Write it Off, Of Course!

While I was working in a family-operated shop (Unruh's TV) in Chilliwack, BC, a kid came in and asked me if I could talk to him about car audio. His idea was that we would get about $10K worth of gear in his car and "sponsor" him. When I asked where he thought the money would come from, his answer was priceless. "You can write it off!" he declared. So I asked him if he knew what "writing off" meant? "Well," he replied, "it's like tax that you write off and get it back." At this point, I'm thinking, OK, someone has to make things simpler for him. So I ask if he had a $10 bill, which he did. I then asked him to place it on the counter, and he hesitantly complied. I took the $10 bill, replaced it with a loonie, and said: "here's your $10 bucks. You can write the other $9 off." He looked at it for two seconds and politely asked if he could get his money back. I gave it back and took my loonie. The kid did come back, and we sold him a smaller system that he was quite proud of.

Elliot Cohen, Vancouver, BC

Extended Warranty & the Green Banana

My friend came back from a ladies club charity meeting and told me this true story about one of the club members. She is 99-year-old and went into a local electronics chain store to buy a big screen TV and a new laptop. She felt it was time to upgrade both units as the laptop was getting slow and the TV not so bright anymore. After making her selections, she spotted a Blu-ray player on sale and took it as well. In hearing this story, I was amazed that someone at 99 years young wants a faster laptop and even knows what a Blu-ray is! At the check out, you get the usual sales pitch about the merits of extended warranty. A four-year extended warranty was offered to the woman. At the end of the sales pitch, she replied: "Honey, at my age, I don't even buy green bananas." I hope I'm half as sharp as she is when I reach that age.

Andrej Baca, Peterborough ON

The Secret Door

I was working at a camera/audio store in Winnipeg in the ‘80s. It was December, so the store was quite busy. It was my first night being in charge of the store as an assistant manager. As the day went on, the till got fuller and fuller with bills to the point where we could no longer close the drawer. I emptied all the bills and put them in a bag. Then I needed a safe place in which to store the bag. In the back room, I noticed a small safe imbedded in the floor. I put in the money and slammed the lid shut. The next day, my boss phoned me saying the till was short almost $10,000. I told him I had put the money in the safe. He said, "What safe?" It turns out they never used that safe because nobody knew the combination. They had to bring in a jack hammer and a torch to get the money out. After that, the remaining hole in the floor was called "Garry's Chasm," and it stayed there for years.

Garry Harrison, Kelowna, BC

I'll Have that Cable on Ice, Please

A customer came into a store I call on regularly. The store had closed about 10-15 minutes earlier, and we were outside having a BBQ and refreshments since it was a beautiful summer day. The gentleman was very stressed out as he needed a long length of cable to get his satellite working for the weekend, and it was Friday. The owner said: "we are out of ice, so if you run down to the store and get four bags, we will terminate a cable to your desired length." The customer found this just as entertaining as we did, brought us back the ice, and was one happy customer.

James Drew, Whitby, ON

Do you have a funny story you'd like to see published in this blog? Contact us at letterstotheeditor@marketnews.ca!